I had a lot of swings since yesterday. I tried not to bother you everyday because I thought you would be bored by me. It has hit me hard, really hard. I lost my appetite, then followed with some other things made me confused, worried, and under pressure. Suddenly, all things gave me problems. I needed you much, very much. But then everything went from bad to worse, when I finally gave up for not contacting you. I hope you would reply, because even when you just say “Hi!”, I would feel so happy. That is how magical you are to me. But, you didn’t reply today. I once again fell into a doubtful feeling. I love you more than everything but it seems I have to really give up hoping you would feel the same. It seems like a one-way love. I don’t know really what to expect. Everything has been great in the last 1 month or so, but I felt like back to ground zero now. Probably, I just lost my mind and fell deep into the euphoria you have given me recently. Probably, I had my mind steps too far.

Since you didn’t reply my text today, I tried to force myself to forget all the problems. I force my brain to shut down and go on the dream world. Once again I dream of you. Another sweet dream, indeed. I had a dream of us being together. I was holding your hand when we walk and you didn’t stop smiling. We met with one of our close friends, she wanted to introduce her fiancé to us. We were waiting for him to come to meet us. Unfortunately, my dad rang me on my mobile and so I woke up and I couldn’t sleep again, so the dream must end there. But, I am happy to have a dream of you.

It is quite weird because I always dream of you whenever I feel hopeless, whenever I start to give up my feeling on you. I used to dream that we just meet somewhere by accident. The last 2 months I have dreamt about us being together. I am not saying that it is a sign. It could be just my obsession of you. But, I take it as a reminder. It reminds me that you, yes YOU, are the one and only who can make me happy and that is why I should not give up on you. I should keep stand there to love you because I feel happy just to love you even when you don’t even say a word. I love you, W.

 

With Love,

eldios©

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